I apologize for the semi-melodramatic previous post; I was in one of those moods. A good friend of mine reminded me the other day of what I had initially planned to accomplish with this semester abroad, and she did this by showing me the description of this blog. I am but one person trying to figure out who I am, what I want to do, who I want to be, where I'm supposed to go. Who's to say I wouldn't feel this way back at school in the States? Who's to say that this is all part of the bigger picture, that this semester is the very thing I needed. And yes, I do still feel homesick (and I say that as somebody who has never been fully one to be homesick), but that's part of this, too.
I've tried to figure this out in my head for some time now, and I think I may have come to some sort of sense. Last semester I think I lost myself, or I lost my drive as a student who prides himself on being on top of his game; I lost that entirely and I stumbled through all of my academics trying to get back on track, to find my footing again. Coming to Italy, while I initially would thought would inspire me to snap back into the usual driven me, has actually opened my eyes to a greater understanding of how I function and how I work best. To say that I've found my footing fully is jumping the gun; to say that I've found that spark that made me that driven person is just (although, I've yet to implement said spark...watch out for an explosive me next semester, though).
So, my apologies for that and for being a generally bad blogger. Be forewarned of the onslaught of new posts...
P.S. Mom and Dad, if you're reading this I might have to ship some stuff home...hope that's okay :)
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